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How Females Can Handle Low Libido

How Females Can Handle Low Libido
Dr. Constance Odom, MD Picture of Dr. Constance Odom, MD

Medically reviewed by

Written by our editorial team.

Last Edited 4 min read

For some men and women, female sexuality is a mystery. There can be periods of intense sexual passion and desire followed by months of low interest and very little arousal. Everyone is quick to blame the arrival of children, the pressures of work, the changes in the body, and simply being bored with the sex routine as the reason for the intimacy roller coaster, and while all of these may have their part, the ultimate responsibility is with a woman’s libido.

Trying to Define Normal

Part of the challenge with defining a normal or accepted range of sexual interest lies with the various factors that influence an individual’s sex drive. From a research perspective, women who near the end of their 20s seem to see the most increase in their sexual desire. Many theorize that experiencing a reduction in fertility gives women a sense of sexual freedom, and libido tends to be at its highest between the 30s and early 40s. In one study, women between the ages of 27 and 45 were shown to have more frequent sexual fantasies that either older or younger women, and these women also had sex more often and more willingly in new relationships. However, as time goes on, the changes in hormones and life circumstances can impact a woman’s sexual desire. This natural fluctuation sometimes corresponds to major bodily changes like pregnancy, illness, or menopause, though mood disorders and mental health conditions can also play a part in a low sex drive. In general, the hormone changes that occur in the female body as it ages also display a decreased interest in sex. Given all of these factors, it can hard to define what normal libido levels should look like.

Looking Past the Status Quo

In figuring out your problems with low libido, you have to stop looking at what everyone else’s sex life looks like. Today’s culture places a lot of emphasis on a healthy sex life, but this too looks different among individuals. In the past, women who craved sex were seen as disturbed or loose, while today’s women can be given the label of dysfunctional if there isn’t a healthy appetite for intercourse. Sexual differences, preferences, experiences, and beliefs all have a role in how much sex is comfortable and necessary in your life. If you look at what culture expects from your sex life, or at least what the media and advertising seem to suggest, you may find yourself chasing down the wrong motivation to get busy in bed. There are so many mental and physical benefits to a robust sex life, but having sex several times a week to simply meet some imaginary quota you assume the world expects from you does nothing for your libido or your emotional security.  Sex should be pleasurable, satisfying, and mutually desired for it to really count as sex. Anything else could be seen as simply giving in to more animal-like instincts of mating.

Pursuing Lust vs Love

Female libido starts in the brain. Contrary to the yearning and sensations you experience in the genitalia, the brain is the largest sex organ. It is also the center of all thoughts and emotions, relying on a complex network of neurotransmitters and neuroendocrine systems to make the connections between sexual desire and response. When the brain experiences interest, it generates signals throughout the body that lead to genital arousal. In females, sexual interest begins with more emotional connections to life circumstances, relationships, and their own self-acceptance. To begin the process of arousal in females (increased vaginal wetness and blood flow into the vagina), it may take a combination of both mental and physical stimulation. Libido may be relatively low or absent when a partner first initiates intercourse, but the female body may experience a spike in libido when the woman fully engages with a mind-body reaction. This connection between mind and body can be referred to as intimacy, which takes arousal past just a physical response.

Without this complex reaction occurring, it can be difficult for women to find themselves in the mood as easily or quickly as men, who tend to have a more physical response to stimulation. Women can be distracted by domestic priorities such as a to-do list, or they struggle to focus on anything but their big presentation at work the next day. Women may also struggle with low energy and fatigue from their busy lifestyle, as well as experiencing mental stress and exhaustion from relationship challenges and feelings of inadequacy. When you can trace the sexual response back to its origins in the brain, it is easier to see how libido is easily impacted by a number of factors both physical and environmental.

Recognizing Low Libido

It’s not abnormal to have dry spells in your sex life. As explained, things like age and life experiences can influence your sexual appetite. However, these seasons should pass and a more consistent attempt to engage in intercourse should resume. It can also be normal for you to desire less sex than your partner at times, but when this happens consistently, your low libido may have deeper roots than just a causal factor. There isn’t a magic number that can be used to define serious libido problems, but when you have no interest in sexual activity of any type, you rarely or never have sexual thoughts or fantasies, and you find yourself worried about how little you think about or desire sexual activities, you know a problem exists. Women with chronic low libido are labeled as having a sexual dysfunction called hypoactive sexual desire disorder, or HSDD.

Treating Low Libido

Going to the doctor and talking about your sex life can be embarrassing. If you don’t want to open up about your personal life, there are a number of things you can do to help restore your sexual interest and desire. For many women, simply restoring the pleasure and satisfaction into intercourse makes a huge difference in how often they want to have sex. While taking steps to improve and build intimacy and emotional connections to your partner is a helpful place to start, you really need to make sure the culmination of these activities- the sex- gives you the return on investment. Increasing women's libido needs to take into account both the arousal and the delivery.

While you may not be able to do anything about your partner’s style or performance, you can enhance your own experience with Scream Cream. This is a transdermal lubricant (cream) that gets applied to the external areas of the clitoris and female genitalia. Though a medical compound that includes a generic Viagra, as well as a vasodilator and bronchodilator, a female can experience increased sensitivity and improved blood flow to the sex organs. This creates a more stimulating and sensational sexual experience, increasing satisfaction and the achievement of orgasm. Scream Cream is able to bring the pleasure back into your sexual experience, leading to greater interest and desire for sex.

Low libido, though a common experience during different periods of a woman’s life, shouldn’t be something that you have resigned yourself to live with. You can give yourself an edge when you choose to add Scream Cream to your sexual experiences. You can use it while masturbating to get yourself back in the mood, or you can use it with your partner to create a whole new approach to intercourse.

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This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. The information contained herein is not a substitute for and should never be relied upon for professional medical advice. Always talk to your physician about the risks and benefits of any treatment. Nu Image Medical may not offer the medications or services mentioned in this article.