Isn’t it ironic that two people will text or chat non-stop when they haven’t met face-to-face, but all their energy for conversation seems to mysteriously vanish when they finally meet for a date? When connecting digitally, it is a lot easier to not feel the pressure of answering something just right or displaying enough enthusiasm. Face-to-face interactions add in distractions, body language, and tone, which can totally reshape a conversation. Not to mention that first date jitters often get the best of you. You don’t want to stick to the 20 questions routine, as it will start to sound like a job interview. However, you don’t want to bore them or isolate them by only talking about yourself. Here are some tips for conversation starters on a first date that can improve your chances of getting a second date.
Talk About Your Hometown
Sharing your experiences about where you are from can increase the connection between you and your date. If you aren’t from the local area, it provides a lot of room for interesting conversation since you can compare experiences or cultures. Talking about childhood memories also reveals different areas of personality or preferences, as well as showing how connected an individual is to their family or their roots. You can ask about siblings, childhood television shows, or games.
Talk About Your Media Interests
Since just about everyone knows what Hulu, Netflix, and Amazon Prime are, you probably won’t go wrong talking about favorite televisions shows, movies, or books. You can fill your date in on the latest episode on a must-see sitcom or you could ask if they’ve seen the latest movie releases. Depending on your interests, you may find that you have never seen any of the movies your date like or vice versa. Though this could make it seem like you are complete opposites, it also becomes a great lead in for another date. You can respond with “That sounds like an interesting movie. I certainly would love to see it. Do you want to plan a takeout and movie night next week?” Books, magazines, or newspapers could be another topic area, though talking about these items could delve into a topic like politics, which is often a no-no on a first date.
Talk About Your Hobbies
Finding out what your date likes to do for fun gives you a lot of useful information for potential next dates. Sharing about your passions and pastimes is also a way to open up about your identity and who you are. When you are sharing this personal stuff back and forth, it moves the date past superficiality and establishes a connection to build on later.
Talk About Your Travels
This one could be tricky, especially if your extensive travel experiences come off as bragging. If your date hasn’t been many places, you could as, about where they would like to go if ever given the chance. You can swap travel stories and picturesque locations, and even throw in the different foods you have tried. Talk about activites they like to do when on vacation or their favorite past vacation spots.
Talk About Ambitions
One of the more natural conversation starters always deals with where an individual works. Your date may not want to talk about their workplace stress with you, or perhaps, they are embarrassed by their job and want to disassociate with it as much as possible. Instead of speaking about their employment, ask about their ambitions or short and long-term goals. You can learn a lot about interests and priorities that way someone describes where they want to be in life.
When You Should Talk Less
There are some topics you should avoid on a first date, especially if you haven’t had a lot of conversation with the individual before the date. The number one topic to stay away from is your past relationships. You don’t want to meet someone new talking about failures of the past, either a past divorce or crazy ex. You also want to stay away from issues with your body, such as hair loss or medical concerns in areas of women's sexual health. You should also avoid getting overly flirtatious or arousing in your conversation. Once the two of you have become a couple, then you can swap secrets about your fantasies or use of Scream Cream. There is nothing wrong with being sexually attracted to your date, but you want to make sure a physical attraction isn’t the only thing that will make you a good match.
First date jitters might have your tripping over your tongue, but practice makes perfect. Mull these topics over in your mind as you prepare for your date so both the questions and the answers flow out naturally.
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